You know you’re a mother when…

You know you’re a mother when…

…you hide with the phone the moment it starts ringing.

…you regularly move little shoes to the right feet.

…you don’t wear white, not for fear of your own spills, but for fear of little hands.

…conversations about poop and pee are totally common in everyday life.

…you wipe the seat before you use the toilet.

…you find buying clothes for your children far more fun than anything for yourself.

…you go to dry your hands and decide the towel has more germs than you had before you washed.

…your dive to save baby’s head has improved with each child.

…You’d trip and end up breaking a leg during naptime before you bump the wrong toy that makes noise.

…you sneak a snack, unwilling to share.

…you’ve cringed in a bathroom stall while a child discussed whatever embarrasses you most.

…you’ve hid in a bathroom stall until you are quite certain any audience of above mentioned discourse has vacated the facilities.

…you’ve found yourself cutting up your food or the food of your spouse far smaller than necessary.

…you’ve cleaned up vomit, made your own mess, then cleaned up both messes.

…you’ve disciplined and went searching for which child was missing a found chunk of hair, all the while praying it’s fixable and not too hideous.

…you’ve rocked a baby and found yourself praying they would hurry up and go to sleep – so that you can too.

…you find yourself scanning the lawn as you mow for one tiny croc shoe, fearful the mower will find it before you do.

…you totally understand when another mother mentions the awful hour before supper.

…you tell your husband you need a raise in pay. He offers a 100% raise. And then you both laugh, because you both know you cannot handle 14 children.

TOS Review: Greene Bark Press

The Old Schoolhouse Magazine’s Review Crew was asked to review the children’s hardcover board book Look Left, Look Right, Look Left Again from Greene Bark Press, Inc. A book designed to teach children how to safely cross the street while engaging the child’s interest in a fun story, I read this to all of my children (multiple times!) and my readers all picked it up on their own – multiple times.

Liberty’s comment was “That book gets stuck in my head!”. While she found that annoying, I found that to be highly effective. She’ll never again forget how to properly check for traffic before crossing a street or parking lot! Sounds like it did it’s job to me! Written by Ginger Pate and illustrated by Rhett Ransom Pennell, it’s a sturdy, colorful board book designed to teach traffic safety. With catchy rhymes, it tells the story of Wally Waddlewater, a duck on a mission with many streets to cross. It contains colorful illustrations, it captured the kids attention and had them reading it often. It was a quick ten minute read that was easy to get into a rhythm with as I read; it made it rather fun. (And then… I could chant it all. day. long. as I went about my day. The things we do for our children.)

My kids all really enjoyed this. Yes, it gets stuck in your head. It still rings through mine, days after having read it. But… I think I’ll make a habit of chanting the “Look Left, Look Right, Look Left Again” phrase each time we cross traffic. With my brood of “ducklings”, it sounds like a great way to reinforce what the book teaches and start a great habit of having them check also, instead of my current habit of checking and hurrying them along. 

Look Left, Look Right, Look Left Again was written for ages 3-8, and retails for $8.50 here.

To read what others thought of Look Left, Look Right, Look Left Again check out the Review Crew Blog here.

Dyslexic Hearing. (Which, I’ve learned, is really possible!)

Charlotte just walked in the room saying, “Momma, I’m hungry. Can I have lunch?” (It’s 4:37 pm. Lunch is O.V.E.R.)

She walked in right as I said to Liberty that I’m going to go through the toys and getting rid of a bunch.

Charlie’s next question had me realizing I have a daughter who does the exact same thing I do: mix up what I hear.

“Why are you getting rid of LUNCH?!”

While the idea had never occurred to me, and I’m certain it would save me both time and money, I don’t think it’s a feasible option. The crabby children and crabby Momma would nix the benefits quite quickly.

Charlotte was quite relieved I wasn’t doing away with lunch. And suddenly, getting rid of some of the toys sounded like a great option to her.

Quality parenting, right there, folks. Without even trying, I showed her how nice I am. I kept lunch and threw the toys instead, and it was all good. Talent. Such talent.

Oh my. I needed a longer nap today.

Scheduling changes.

Yesterday we finally wrapped up school at 5:45 pm. With most of our days looking like that so far this school year, my house has suffered. Blogging has suffered. Laundry has fallen behind. And I’m going crazy.

This morning, knowing something had to change but still pondering on what, I typed up a schedule. I gave a time to breakfast, and a time for breakfast to be over. I gave school a start time, moved chores to the afternoon instead of the morning, and said chores get done directly after lunch. Then, at 2:00 pm, you either get back to school or, when school is finished, you have free time until 5:00 pm.

Today, the child that finished last yesterday – at 5:45 pm, finished school at 10:45 am. They are, at the moment, enjoying their 45 minute lunch break (I was generous with times. I hate harping.) before starting afternoon chores. Only two of the four have schoolwork to finish this afternoon. And I may have, just maybe, not gotten any more gray hairs this morning.

Amazing.

While I refuse to hold my breath on whether this works every day, today has been so much better. See, I’m blogging? There’s only one more load of laundry to be done before there are only empty baskets in the laundry room, and I have hope of getting the lawn mowed and house straightened before the end of today.

Hope. Hope is a wonderful thing.

Scattered.

Life is pretty mundane right now. My pregnancy is creeping toward 12 weeks, I’m starting to feel better but have started throwing up on occasion. Strange. My ultrasound showed just one baby, due mid-March. Exactly what I thought. It’s measuring a week or two bigger, but nothing enough to change dates. After two miscarriages, seeing a baby live and moving and growing on the screen was amazing. So thankful.

In other news, Charlotte told me my crack was showing when my shirt crept a little lower in the neckline that she thought it ought.

I see the midwife tonight for the first time this pregnancy. Strangely looking forward to it. Very different than my five OB/Family Doctor experiences. Bonus: no exams. Maybe that’s why I’m looking forward to it.

A friend kept my kids during my ultrasound. She has six children too. There were 12 kids ages 1.5-10.5 in her house. She had all of her hair when I returned. Kudos to Laura.

I folded nine loads of laundry this afternoon. I paused the wash; fearful I’d never catch up if I didn’t stop washing the laundry. Tomorrow I get to wash… about nine loads of laundry. And mow the lawn that’s starting to go to seed on the top. It’s been a week of falling behind. Dishes in the kitchen reached new heights. Horrible, stinky heights. All better now… and I kept my lunch down to boot. Amazing.

I had to get my maternity clothes out. Back to the world of tents and elastic. Such a lovely place to be.

The kids and I all got our teeth cleaned at the dentist this morning. Sterling had an x-ray to check his adult teeth formation. He’s going to have enormous front teeth. The hygienist told me that, showed me the x-ray, then told me he takes after me. So honored. Good thing has has my big round head to match.

Ruby turns five next week. She’s been counting the days for months. I can’t wait to give her her gifts.

Last night was awful. Watching my child endure a bad experience that I have no control over and know she’ll never forget  is heart breaking. I hope she grows from it. I’m seriously questioning my mothering capabilities. I’m glad it’s another 8 or so years before I have to let any of my kids go. Awful.

The shelf in the fridge fell off today and condiments crashed to the floor of the fridge. No one was even touching it. I’m amazed how fast we break things around here.

Crockpot Pizza is for supper. It’s one of my new favorite recipes. I’ll have to share it one of these days. Seriously easy and so good.

We’ve been talking personality tests and types lately. I’m a ISTJ on the Myers-Briggs. A ‘C’ on the DISC assessments. What are you?

TOS Review: Doorposts

Liberty and I have had the privilege to review a Bible study book from Doorposts for ages 12 and up called Beauty in the Heart: A Study of Godly Beauty for Young Women as part of the Old Schoolhouse Magazine and their Review Crew. Liberty is just ten years old, a bit below the recommended age group. She and I have done the study together – necessary for her at her age and level of understanding, but it worked well for us.



The first thing I noticed was that we weren’t just studying beauty. We weren’t just studying from your typical places in Scripture. We were all over the Old and New Testament, and we were studying different methods for Scripture study. It was teaching how to study alongside the study itself. With a concordance pretty much required and a new set of colored pencils in hand to highlight Scripture, we set out to learn about beauty and what God says about it. The questions, I found, were pretty open ended. Some of them we found hard to find the answers to, but when we were finished, we’d read and studied and cross referenced and looked for authors and timelines and learned so much.

 
There are ten different studies that spend a few days to a week on each topic. They include:

• Beauty in Submission
• Beauty in the Heart
• Beauty in Trusting God
• Beauty in Humility
• Beauty in Modesty
• Beauty in Serving
• Beauty without Discretion
• Beauty in Crisis
• Beauty in the Gates
• Beauty in Review

The study touches on many women in Scripture – like Sarah, Ruth, and Esther. It has the studier reading large amounts of Scripture. No fluff here! Liberty has never done a specific study like this before, and this one took her into the deep end. She loved it – and the time she got to spend with me, one on one. We both learned a lot and I can’t wait to do this study again with each of my girls as they approach their teenage years. Modesty is a much-discussed topic in our home, and not something we’ve fought about (yet…) but learning what the Bible says about this topic and several others was fantastic. With a mother who loves jewelry, adornment was another great topic to study and discuss.

At this point, I’ll not hesitate to jump into any Doorposts study, expecting quality. It uses KJV and ESV, both versions I appreciate, but it’s easy enough to use your own version. Marking up your Bible is encouraged – something I cringe at, but I need to get over it. Liberty jumped into that with both feet and loved the color coordination of it. My perfectionist child found her niche.

Beauty in the Heart is written by Pam Forster, sells for $14.00 and contains 86 days of study broke down into five days a week spending 5-20 minutes a day. Special bonus: use the coupon "beautystudy" in your shopping cart to get a free instant-download PDF copy of the Bible study when you pre-order the paperback (Print books will ship by 8/29. Special ends 8/31). To order the book, read Doorposts’ description, and view sample pages, click here.

To read more reviews on this book and Because You Are Strong: A Study of Godly Strength for Young Men, check out the Review Crew Blog.

Cats

We have barn cats. Very wild barn cats. The boys weren’t even sure what a cat was because they had never really seen one. So we got a couple cats. One of them disappeared 3 days after we brought him home. We think the owl that has been lusting after my chickens got him. We currently have Cat and Bob. In hindsight I should have pressed for different names. These names create a bit of confusion for little boys at the museum when looking at a bobcat….

Cat somehow seems to escape the majority of ‘loving’.

Bob, however, does not.

We even had to test out his swimming abilities! Poor Bob.

He’s mild mannered enough that this same night, he got snuck into the bathtub. At least the water was warm the 2nd time, I guess. I finally had to get after the boys and tell them they absolutely could NOT make him go swimming anymore.

 

Still, I don’t think that they have life all that bad.